USE in a  Sentence

Erap was asked by a gradeschooler to test his english ability.
Kids : Use Deduct, Defense, Detail & Defeat in a sentence.
Erap: (after 15 minutes of silence) DEDUCT jumped over DEFENSE, DEFEAT first, then DETAIL!!

Transalation 

Erap while translating a speech.
 "We must strive" Kailangan nating magsikap.
 "We must help others" Kailangan nating magtulungan.
 "In union there is strength" SA SIBUYAS ME TIGAS !!!

MUDAFUCKA

While in New York city, a Erap bumped a man.
Man : Hey, watch where you're goin' you "MUDAFUCKA".
Erap : Eh ta-tanga tanga ka pala, "MADAFA KA RIN SANA"!!

SICK 

While in the Malacanang clinic.
Erap : It's been a month since my last visit and I still feel miserable.
Doc : Did you follow my instructions?
Erap : Yes Doc, sabi sa bote ng drug "KEEP TIGHTLY CLOSED"!!

CREMATION 

While in a friend's wake.
Erap : Tayo na Jinggoy, mauna na tayo.
Jinggoy : Dad, maaga pa naman, kararating lang natin.
Erap : Hindi mo ba nabasa yung sign "REMAINS WILL BE CREMATED"!!

PENSHOPPE 

While in a store to buy a pen.
Erap : Miss mey ballpen ba kayo dito? Clerk : Wala ho kaming ballpen.
Erap (MAD) : Bakit ang ipinangalan n'yo sa store nyo "PENSHOPPE"?